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Infidelity- Cognitive Therapy for the Hurt Partner and Unfaithful Partner
Infidelity continuing education social worker CEUs

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Audio Transcript Questions The answer to Question 1 is found in Track 1 of the Course Content. The Answer to Question 2 is found in Track 2 of the Course Content… and so on. Select correct answer from below. Place letter on the blank line before the corresponding question. Do not add any spaces.
Important Note! Numbers below are links to that Section. If you close your browser (i.e. Explorer, Firefox, Chrome, etc..) your answers will not be retained. So write them down for future work sessions.

Questions:
1. What are therapist judgments that can interfere with infidelity counseling?
2. What are emotional losses experienced by the hurt partner following an affair?
3. How do male and female hurt partners tend to differ in terms of feelings of inadequacy following an affair?
4. What are conflicting aspects of the unfaithful partner’s response to the disclosure of an affair?
5. How do men and women differ in regards to believing an affair is justified?
6. What are keys aspects concerning exploring ideas about love with couples dealing with infidelity?
7. What are indicators that can help the hurt partner assess whether the unfaithful partner is likely to follow through on their promise not have another affair?
8. What are reasons based upon insecurities partners may choose to stay in a relationship following an infidelity crisis?
9. What are essential growth experiences that can influence the way a couple handles an infidelity crisis?
10. What are aspects of the Flip Flop Factor?
11. What are guidelines to enhance the Trust Enhancing Chart technique?
12. What is a key difference between low cost and high cost behavioral changes?
13. What are cognitive blocks that can create resistance to behavioral change following an infidelity crisis?
14. What are intimate listening techniques that can help the hurt and unfaithful partner understand each  other?

 Answers:
A.  Be as positive and specific as possible, respect your partner’s requests as being important, respond to different requests on different days, put your lists in a visible place, record the date on the chart when your partner responds to a request, do what your partner requests whether or not you feel hopeful about the future, and revise your list as you learn more about yourself and your relationship.
B.  Underlying attitudes, a history of deception, an ability to communicate openly, an ability to hear and empathize with pain, and a willingness to take an appropriate share of responsibility for the affair.
C.  The beliefs that "I can’t make it on my own", "my religion says my marriage vow cannot be broken", "the idea of separating is too overwhelming", and "I’m responsible for taking care of my partner".
D.  I don’t have the right to ask my partner to change; I should keep my dissatisfaction to myself to avoid conflict; I shouldn’t have to tell my partner what I need; If I have to ask for love, I don’t want it; as soon as I start trusting again, we’ll be back where we started; my partner hurt me so they should change first; and I can’t act in trust enhancing ways when I’m so angry.
E.  Judging whether an affair is good or bad, separating the couple into victim and victimizer, and suggesting the couple should stay together no matter what.
F.  the loss of the sense of specialness, the loss of self-respect, the loss of the feeling of control, the loss of a sense of order, and the loss of a sense of purpose.
G.  The Cross-Over Technique and the Disarming Technique.
H.  Women tend to believe their affair is justified when it is for love, while men tend to believe their affair is justified when it is not for love
I.  Unrequited love, romantic love, confronting unrealistic expectations, the disenchantment process, and determining where ideas about love come from.
J.  functioning independently, having solid emotional connections, being able to value yourself, and living with realistic limitations.
K.  Male hurt partners tend to feel inadequate sexually, while female hurt partners tend to feel inadequate as companions.
L.  Relief, impatience, absence of guilt isolation, and self-disgust.
M.  1. Qualities a client might like best in their partner may be the flip side of the attributes they find the most objectionable; 2. Dissatisfaction about certain attributes may say as much about the client’s own unresolved inner conflict as it does about the partner.
N.  Low cost behavioral changes are the responsibility of both partners, while high cost behavioral changes are generally the responsibility of the unfaithful partner.

Course Content Manual Questions The Answer to Question 15 is found in Section 15 of the Course Content… and so on. Select correct answer from below. Place letter on the blank line before the corresponding question.
Important Note! Numbers below are links to that Section. If you close your browser (i.e. Explorer, Firefox, Chrome, etc..) your answers will not be retained. So write them down for future work sessions.

Questions:
15. What are the major stages of the integrative approach to treating couples recovering from infidelity?
16. According to Whitty, what are reasons the Internet is an appealing place to seek out affairs?
17. What does current research indicate about gendered perceptions of men’s motivation for an extrarelationship involvement?
18. What is the "cognitive interweave"?
19. According to Ferch, what is involved in psychoeducation for intentional forgiveness?
20. In therapy involving intentional forgiving, when should the counselor become less directive?
21. According to Scheel, what is a benefit of presenting different rationales that match individual partner positions in therapy?
22. According to Boekhout, what is the major difference between justifications for infidelity used by men and women?
23. In Ripley’s study, which intervention group was the most effective at enhancing couple interactions?
24. What are defense mechanisms in object relations theory?
25. What is meant by "good faith" contracting?
26. What are three categories of therapist responses to blaming events?
 Answers:
A. clients become better able to address relational hurts through intentional forgiveness both in and out of session.
B.  The hope-focused marital enrichment psychoeducational group
C.  1. an impact stage, involving absorbing and experiencing the impact of the interpersonal trauma; 2. a search for meaning for the trauma, along with an awareness of the implications for this new understanding; and 3. moving forward with one’s life within the context of a new set of relationship beliefs.
D.  both partners initiate positive changes in their behaviors, including those involving trust, independently of what the other party does.
E. 1. ignoring/diverting; 2. acknowledging/challenging; 3. reframing
F.  involves introducing forgiveness as a choice, encouraging reconciliation when appropriate, and actively teaching clients the understandings and skills necessary for intentional forgiveness.
G.  Women believe that men may often engage in extrarelationship involvements in order to satisfy or inflate their egos, but men do not believe this as strongly.
H.  1. introjection, 2. splitting, 3. projection and protective identification
I.  Women are more likely than men to link their extradyadic involvements with martial dissatisfaction.
J.  1. The online relationship can become idealized through the process of splitting, and it might be easier to idealize an individual online; 2. Cyberspace presents more radical opportunities to find the perfect object/individual.
K.  a set of strategies which assist the adaptive information processing system (AIPS) to shift or process an 'information package' held in dysfunctional states specific form, into more appropriate and functional form.
L. Presenting different rationales for doing the same thing (the intervention) demonstrates acknowledgment and respect for different viewpoints. It also demonstrates the coexistence of contrasting positions within a relationship.


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